Monday, November 25, 2013

Longest Marriage


"Week in Photos: Full moon, longest marriage & more
Full moon
A selection of the most striking images from around the world in the last seven days. News, sports, animals and people.
A statue of the Angel Moroni on top of a Latter-day Saints temple is silhouetted against the rising full moon in Kansas City, Mo., on Nov. 18."  Taken from the MSN Website.


This picture and title are on the front page of the msn website today. The title for the first picture is full moon, the second picture title is longest marriage. I couldn’t help but think that the two titles could actually represent both in the angel Moroni picture since being married in the LDS temple binds marriages for time and all eternity so the marriage in essence will be the longest marriage as well.

November 25 2013 Happenings in Lima

Wedding Night.  Groom Ended up Getting Stuck at Work and Came Late. So Late We Missionaries Missed the Wedding.

We Did Not Miss the Baptism the Next Day However!






Hey momma! Yeah I was way curious what that job was all about. I´m sorry it didn´t turn into something better. Are you and the family going to the Beck Christmas reunión? I haven´t Heard if that was in the plans or not. I have been having dreams night after night of being home. It has been so tough. I forget them throughout the day so its fine but it makes it tough to get up. They are so real! Haha Dreams that I´m fresh off my misión at home hanging out with you and watching tv, going out to eat, running errands and things like that like before the mish. I sure miss you mommy! =)

Yeah here are some pictures of Diego and his family. The girl with my companion and I is his wife on their wedding night. We went to their wedding that was supposed to start at 8 but Diego Works in security and they had some sort of problem at work. He couldn´t get there until 930 when we had to be in our rooms so we couldn´t see it. =( but we got a picture with her as proof that we were there! Haha it was ok though because he got baptised the next day. You can read the story in dad´s letter. He is awesome. I love you sooo much mom! Thank you so much for doing that jacket for me. I know it was a hassle and a lot of money. But you just made the life of a fantastic, Peruvian man that deserves something super special. =) I love you so much mommy! Tell the family I love them too!

Elder Hackleman (Your oldest)

Sunday, November 10, 2013

Do's and don'ts for parents of returned Mormon missionaries - Deseret News Article

Do’s and don’ts for parents of returned Mormon missionaries
By Andy Proctor
For The Returned Missionary
Published: Monday, Nov. 4 2013 6:00 a.m. MST
Updated: Wednesday, Nov. 6 2013 9:48 a.m. MST

If you are a parent or a family member of a missionary who is coming home, you may have had a similar experience. Either way, here are some great pointers for you from a former mission president who has had almost a dozen returned missionaries, not to mention being the mission “parent” of all the missionaries in his mission. The do's and don'ts are direct quotes, and the commentary between is more of my personal interpretation. Please provide feedback. We’re open to more things that help!

1. "DO remember your purpose and their purpose — it is the same. The overarching purpose is the same."

Though they leave the mission and come home to a new life, we all still have the same purpose: to invite others to come unto Christ and become more like him. Remember that this is what they eat, sleep and drink as a missionary, and it should be the same for us. Don’t be surprised if they still eat, sleep and drink it. Embrace it. Be humble and learn from what they have learned. They have so much to teach.

2. "DO be the kind of adult you want them to be! The bar was raised for them, but it was also raised for you."
Understand "Preach my Gospel" because that is their language. If you know the language of "Preach My Gospel," you’ll know their language. If you haven’t already, don’t be afraid to pull out the manual and read through it. If you do, it’s guaranteed that your communication with them will improve when they get home.

3. "DON’T treat them like you did before their mission. DO let them be something better and greater than they were before."

Ask them how they think they have changed. Ask them to teach you what they have learned. Remember, they are not the high school kid you knew before. They have been through a rigorous program for 18 months to two years, and there is no way they are the same. The worst thing you could do is let them lose what they have gained on the mission. This may be uncomfortable, but love them enough to let them rise above who they were before their mission. Feel free to share this article with your recently returned missionary about how they can keep the missionary “glow” forever:www.thereturnedmissionary.com/keeping-the-missionary-glow/

4. "DO encourage them in their daily personal prayer and scripture study, and DO hold daily family prayer and scripture study and weekly family home evenings with them."

Support them in keeping the same standards they kept when on the mission. And when they are ready and the circumstances permit, encourage them to go to the family home evening activities in their young single adult wards. Until then, do the best you can to support the standards they lived on the mission. This will bless your home.

5. DON’T let them have a long vacation, but DO strongly encourage them to become anxiously engaged after a short rest."

A happy returned missionary is a busy returned missionary. If you do decide to go on a short family trip or vacation after their mission, this is fine. But when you get back, help them to stay busy. Provide a list of things that they can do that will keep them busy. They are used to working longer hours than a full-time job requires. If they don’t get working soon, it will be quite a shock to them. Don’t be afraid of rest, but help them to keep working hard. Hard work is a good thing. You know this.

6. "DO use a balanced approach in encouraging them regarding dating and marriage, finding a job, getting an education, church service, family responsibility, etc."

Encourage them. Don’t pressure them. They are already used to setting goals and achieving them, but this is a brand new world for them. There will be more articles on this website that will cover many of these subjects such as dating, marriage, employment, education, etc. Just make sure they know they are loved, and, above all, help them remember the highest in themselves, that they are born to be great, and that the best always happens after the mission.

7. "DO lovingly help them to become functioning adults, dressing and acting the part.

They are expected to be adults for two years or 18 months. They budgeted for themselves, shopped for themselves, did their own laundry, cleaned their apartment, paid rent and utilities, went to the doctor and everything else. Don’t take that away from them when they get home. Let them be functioning adults again. Though you should make sure that they get all the medical and dental help when they get home. You also may suggest a new wardrobe for them when they return, but don’t be offended if they don’t want your style advice. Here is a quick post from our blog about why it is a good idea for returned missionaries to refresh their wardrobe, if possible.

8. "DO encourage them to pick one ward to attend and to have a calling in that ward as soon as possible, rather than float between young single adult wards and your home ward."

From the church handbook: “Eligible members may, in consultation with their parents, choose to be members of the YSA ward or to remain in their conventional ward.” (Handbook 2, section 16.4) If you can, encourage bishops to call them immediately as ward missionaries and as temple workers (where possible). Returned Missionaries need the same things as new members: (1) A friend, (2) a calling, and (3) nourishment by the good word of God.

9. "DO encourage them to attend their sacrament meeting and other meetings as well as the temple and institute, every week."

10. "DON’T encourage them to participate in worldly media, movies or video games they missed while on the mission."

DO strongly encourage them to follow the standards and guidelines found in "For the Strength of Youth" and "Preach My Gospel." The worst thing you could do for them is to show them the five best movies they missed while they were gone. Remember the “For the Strength of Youth” booklet doesn’t just apply to youth. The standards are the same for returned missionaries and for parents and families of returned missionaries as well. Consider these words from the first presidency:

"Satan uses media to deceive you by making what is wrong and evil look normal, humorous or exciting. He tries to mislead you into thinking that breaking God’s commandments is acceptable and has no negative consequences for you or others. Do not attend, view or participate in anything that is vulgar, immoral, violent or pornographic in any way. Do not participate in anything that presents immorality or violence as acceptable. Have the courage to walk out of a movie, change your music, or turn off a computer, television or mobile device if what you see or hear drives away the Spirit."

If one of the top five best movies that came out while they were serving a mission has anything that is vulgar, violent or pornographic in any way or that portrays immorality or violence as acceptable, none of us should be watching it. If it is family tradition to have a movie night together, that is wonderful! Just choose wisely, and not just with your recently returned missionary.

This is in no way a comprehensive list, but these are good guidelines to follow, and, above all, follow the promptings of the Spirit to help you to know how you can be a springboard for your returned missionaries and not a stumbling block.

Tuesday, November 5, 2013

Elder Hackleman's Younger But Bigger Brother's Senior Pictures













This Week's Letters

Elder Hackleman,

This is Grandma Polly. I am having a great time in Nebraska with all the family but I sure miss you. I haven't heard anything but wonderful things about you while you have been on your mission. I am proud of you. I am glad I get to be with your mom on her birthday. I look up at your pictures all day every day and think about how much I miss you, but I am thankful for what you are doing and the success you are having and I am proud of you. Tomorrow is your mom's birthday.

I've enjoyed getting to watch the boys play football except for how cold it was outside. I love you and I'm proud of you and I think about you a lot.

Love Grandma Polly

Jaren,

This is Nathan. So the Heat lost 100-101 against the Nets. I guess it's the first time since January that they have lost a game. Kind of bummed. Church basketball is coming up soon. I'll be Lebroning it up out there. Since football season is over we had a pizza party and they handed out certificates to everybody who stayed with the team throughout the whole season. So mine is hanging up in the living room by one of your missionary pictures.

I am getting my patriarchal blessing next Sunday after stake conference. I'm looking forward to it. I was sustained as 2nd counselor in the teachers quorum. President is Adam Jorgenson and 1st counselor is Bruyn Decker, and Jacob Banks as secretary.

School is going great. I am learning a lot. The girls are after me (so pretty much nothing's changed). :)

I went to Kael's baptism on Saturday and drove home from the Jenson Auto shop. Perfect A+. Just saying. K Bye.

Nathan

Jaren,

This is Grant. Hey bro what's up? Gma Polly is here. So we are like having so much fun. We like went to 6 flags. Gma rode the scariest ride ever. Man you should have seen her face. She was like ahhhhhhh. Good job on the test I gave you. Yesterday we watched the movie "Ender's Game." It was so awesome. Apparently a writer for the movie teaches at Southern Virginia University, you know that college you went to, if you can even remember. It was like 70 years ago. I still have my stereo. It is in best shape ever. It looks like we just bought it yesterday. If you had to choose between a nerf gun and Beats headphones, which one would you choose?

Football ended like 2 weeks ago. And so I am bummed. We only lost one game and that one game made me so mad, the refs felt like they weren't even there. We smeared the Monarchs when we played them. Uncle Jeff got to see that game.

I am waiting for next quarter because dodge ball starts up so I am pretty excited to start that.

So apparently it's Seth's turn to email and I seriously can't think of anything else to tell you. In fact I just thought of a question, what is it like, now being in Peru forever and such, going to the bathroom and are you used to it now?

So Love you!

Did I tell you I love you?

Grant

Elder Hackleman,

From Mom

I don't know if you can tell, but Grant is telling a fish tale when he says we went to 6 flags. For some reason he thought that would be funny. He's so silly.

So, as you might have heard your dad had a panic attack the other day and thought something bad was happening to you. Sorry for sending such weird messages to your mission family. Tim just had to make sure you were ok.
We sure love you!

Amy

Sheesh! Yeah it sent me on a panic attack as well! Haha but don´t you worry. I am doing grate! (Cept I really cant spell anymore.) Haha

Grandma! Hey grams!!! I hope you are having a blast with the fam! I sure do miss you and all the time we spent together at your house and Joel´s! Please give my mommy a big huge hug for me. It´s pretty cool that your favorite daughter and my favorite mom are the same person! What a coincidence! Haha I sure do love you and just know that your grandson is working hard on his mission. He has an awesome missionary example in his grandpa that he wants to try to live up to. Love you!

Hey nay! I am so excited slash bummed that you are getting your patriarchal blessing. I still remember every moment of the day that I got my patriarchal blessing and as a missionary, you read it ALOT. It´s ok buddy. Don´t worry about Lebron. Even the best basketball player of all time needs to lose a few to show the world that he´s still humble. I´m so proud of you for sticking it out in football. I know it is tough, but I promise you Nathan, you will make memories in those games that you will remember the rest of your life, and that makes it way worth the yucky practices. I love you big guy.

Grant! I bet you didn´t think about the fact that I already knew that six flags doesn´t exist in Nebraska. Nice try silly head. =) I´m glad you had fun in football! And yes I did know the author of the Ender´s game works at SVU. If I ever actually felt like reading a book, I would have tried to find him....but I didn´t. Hahaha I would definitely choose beats headphones. But they are like 300 bucks. Haha And yes I have been here a while and am used to using the bathroom here. Thanks for asking. Love you buddy!

Hey mom! I sure do love you and hope you have a happy birthday. You may be surprised to read this but I actually both remembered your birthday and got you a birthday present. I just haven´t found the time to get to the post office to send it. I love you mommy! I hope you have a fantastic 25+a few years birthday!

Elder Hackleman

From Seth,

Jeffery! Wassup bro? You'r biggest brother is officially the saddest person on the planet right now. We had such a good team this year... and we lost in the first round of the playoffs. We were able to kick so much tail this season and then blew it right at the end. it's crazy to think i will never be able to play under the High School football Friday night lights. ever. again. I was so mad you can't even believe. Of course everybody was crying but i was to upset to haha. we should have made it AT LEAST to the final four. we would have lost against Millard West in the final four game but we definitely should have beat Creighton Prep and even more definitely should have beat Westside! it was a great season but as you know, its hard when its over. i don't know what to do with my life now with all this extra free time i will have now! mom and i took my senior pics yesterday. some of them look pretty good. You know those concrete cylinders by our house you took pics in? we went there and back behind them a little ways we found an old rusty piece of farm equipment that literally looks like an alien ship. not even kidding. it's pretty cool looking haha. I miss you Jare Bear! keep up the hard work and stay away from the drug cartels! i hear they get a little cranky sometimes. hey i haven't told you one of my jokes in a long time so i'll end with one just for old times sake!

Why don't orphans play baseball?????

They can't find home! hahaha love you buddy!

-Seth

Haha Oh Sethy. If someone else would have told me that joke, I would have thought, in one way or another, that joke went through my brother Seth´s head. I know how you feel about football. Well, no I don´t. I have never played on a good football team my entire life. Haha No but I do understand. I am so proud of how well you´ve done with football. Friday night lights are over but that doesn´t mean there won´t ever be saturday night lights for you buddy! =) I just have one piece of advice for you that I´ve learned while being out here. If you keep the promptings of the Spirit with you in all of your decisions, you will be a very successful man in your life. If you have football in your future, you know I will always back you up. But you are at a very critical time in your life now that no one understands more than me. Keep your mission in your blinders now and everything in your life will fall into place. It sure as clank wont be easy, but Heavenly Father definitely has a plan for you Seth. I love you buddy. Work hard in school and in seminary. Hit the weight room more than ever just to keep all your options open. =)
Your not so big brother,

Elder Hackleman

Dear Elder,

Well, it's your mom's birthday today!!! We had a great week. How was yours??? There was only one very sad time and that was when the Titan's lost their first playoff game to Creighton Prep 23-17. The Hackleman football season is officially over. However, Sidney made it to the playoffs and won their first game against Blair. Their next game is on Friday in Gretna which is about 15 miles from our house! I think we're all going to go watch and cheer on the Raiders.

Nathan is getting his Patriarchal Blessing next week. We are so excited for him!! We have a youth Temple Trip on Saturday. I'm really looking forward to that! I haven't had a chance to get to the temple for a few months now. Speaking of which, we have a new Temple Presidency. Remember Pres. Schoof who met with you at the Temple? He and his councilors have been released. We haven't met the new Presidency yet, but we will on Saturday!!

How was your week of appointments?? You told us about all the referrals you got with your way awesome activity. Did any of them pan out??

So did anything significant happen with you on Thursday around 11:00 am? I had a dream about you on Wednesday night. I was in the mission field with you and was with two other Elders. I was so upset because I couldn't find my little white book or my name tag!!! Anyway that wouldn't let us communicate. I was down there without your mom and I saw you at the back of a group of other Elders. You flashed me the sign language sign for I love you. Then I woke up. It didn't seem too significant until about 11:00 I started to panic about what it meant. It could have been the fact that I was just missing you is all.

Everyone here is doing well. We're all healthy. I am so grateful for that. The Lord has truly blessed us with so many blessings that we can't even count them all. Every week that passes, I can't believe that we made it through. But we do, and I know it's because He's watching over ALL of the Hackleman's.

Just some fun news: The Kansas City Chiefs and Alex Smith are the only undefeated team in the NFL. They are 9-0. Our Utes aren’t doing so well. They just can't get it together on Offense.

Anyway, off to bed. You're getting extra long emails today!! How's your health doing???

¡Ámele hijo!

Papá

Hey dad.

First of all, it is safe to say that you can mark your dream and all your feelings down as the most spiritual experience you and I have shared in our lives.

We just started teaching this kid named xxxxxxx. Our first lesson with him was on thursday at 11. He started by telling us about some serious home problems that he has been having. His parents are separated. His mom is a hard core jehova´s witness and has pretty much disowned him for his friends and interest in our church. His dad is with some other lady and is a drunk who beats just about everyone who crosses him. This kid pretty much bounces from home to home. His aunts, his friends, and others and sometimes he just sleeps in a park by our house. He is good friends with my pensionists daughter and pretty much considers my pensionist and her husband his parents. My companion could relate with what he was talking about alot more than I could because my companion´s mom walked out on his family while he was like 3 and he´s been living with his dad his entire life. He is one of 10 kids! So they had many times in their lives where food wasn´t there sometimes. So my companion was talking while I was praying for him to know what to say to help this guy. The whole time I was thinking, I have never experienced anything close to this in my entire life. We had some hard times sure, but I never went hungry and certainly never went without a bed. After thinking about that I just became overcome with love for you dad. I have always loved you and mom more than anything and I was thinking alot about her too. But for a few moments, all I could do was think of how grateful I was to have you as my dad. And that you got up bright and early every morning to go to work at a job that you really didn´t like to much for our family. And I never heard you complain about any of it. So anyway, I was thinking that I knew I would have to share something so I prayed very hard in my mind to know what to say. It reached a point in our conversation where I knew it was my turn. I bent down and opened up my book of mormon, still having no idea what I was going to share or say. I just opened the book and looked at the first verse that my eyes went to and read it silently in my head really fast. It was a verse in alma that talked about the challenges that you goes through are very difficult but don´t worry. You are young and the Lord is always with you. Seek the counsels of your elder bretheren. It was so amazing and the Spirit was felt so strong. I am so grateful that the Spirit made sure that my imperfections did not get in the way of the progress of this boy.

Anyway, if you aren´t crying by now, you lost your tear ducts in Nam. Haha but your dream was no coincidence Dad. I know I gave you that love sign in sign language in my heart in that lesson and in your dream for my gratitude that I have the best dad in the world. We both know I have the best mom in the world, that goes without saying. =) But You definitely need to know as well. I love you guys so much.




Your oldest and proud son

Elder Hackleman